JoeDoe
Monday, June 22, 2009 at 03:07PM 
Note: The chef’s response to this review and my response to him are in the comments. My follow-up comments are here.
I’m going to go out on a limb, and guess that when Joe Dobias was trying to pick a catchy name for his East Village restaurant, he didn’t hire any publicity or marketing firms for advice. That might explain how he came up with JoeDoe, a name that conveys—nothing in particular.
Of course, “Momofuku” conveyed nothing in particular before David Chang turned it into a household word, but usually it’s better to choose a name that conveys at least something about the kind of food you’re trying to serve. We can’t all be David Chang.
Dobias describes his cuisine as “Aggressive American,” whatever that means. He certainly has a way with words when it comes to naming his dishes. During Passover season, he served liver and bacon on challah, calling it “The Conflicted Jew.” Other examples on a recent menu include “Some Really Nice Butt” and “Duck Egg is King.”
He works in a tiny slip of a space scarcely bigger than a bathroom (above right). There is a prep kitchen downstairs, and runners bring stuff in throughout the evening, but Dobias seems to do all the cooking and plating by himself.
The restaurant has just seven tables and six bar stools, which is probably as much as Dobias can handle when it is full—if it ever is. On a Friday evening, just one other table was occupied.
The menu is uncomplicated, with just half-a-dozen appetizers ($9–12) and as many entrées ($19–27). There are also several bar snacks at about $4 each, but during happy hour they’re free. We had the Mutton Meatballs (left), which were the best thing we had all evening. A comped order of fried chickpeas was excellent.
The beverage menu offers an array of house cocktails and “prepared beers,” the latter being mixed drinks made with beer instead of spirits. I lubricated my meal with a couple of these, as I don’t recall seeing them in any other restaurant, and the wine list was minimal.
I loved the Hipster BBQ (Dale’s Pale Ale, organic vodka, seasoned salt, fresh lime and zest), but I didn’t care for the somewhat bitter taste of Alice in JoeDoe Land (Smuttynose ale, absinthe, gingered kumquat, chamomile tea).
As we sat down for dinner, the staff pointed out a rule prohibiting photography, which purportedly annoys the other guests—notwithstanding that there weren’t any, aside from a loving couple at the opposite end of the room who, we are sure, did not notice our non-flash camera. So we are unable to show you the photos of what we ate, which looked a lot better than it tasted.
A Veev Cured Scallop ($12) made a dull impression. Veev (a brand of vodka) contributed little, other than its fancy name. A schmear of jalapeno mayo was more than the scallop needed, but not enough to spread on the accompanying crisp bread. A salad of cured pork on lukewarm cooked green vegetables also misfired.
Pork belly, a posted special, was over-cooked and dry. “Duck, duck, hock,” consisting of tiny gnocchi, a duck egg, and I believe duck ham, was at least correctly prepared, though I would be in no rush to order it again. (The website says that the third ingredient is rock shrimp, but I am pretty sure that is not what we had.)
On Eater.com, editor Amanda Kludt described JoeDoe as “a restaurant that means well,” but found it “disappointing and somewhat bafflingly presented.” That’s about right. It’s obvious that Dobias didn’t open this restaurant to get rich, and he certainly doesn’t take the easy way out. Its quirky offerings often sound interesting, but when the plates arrive the payoff isn’t there.
In a neighborhood that teems with compelling dining options, it’s hard to take JoeDoe seriously. I’d stop in for a cocktail and a snack; then head elsewhere.
JoeDoe (45 E. 1st Street between First & Second Avenues, East Village)
Food: mediocre
Service: good
Ambiance: pleasant
Overall: disappointing
Reader Comments (55)
Criticism is a key part of this business. Dobias's hostility is not only bad form but self-sabotage. Some self-control is seriously in order.
I had misfortune of having dinner there about a month ago - and from your review, i believe you are being too kind. I knew the second i walked in that i wasn't going to enjoy it and then once i took a look at the menu, my suspicions were confirmed. Completely obnoxious titles; i was almost embarrassed telling my waiter what i wanted. And if you are going to call a dish "duck, duck, hock" and charge over $20, make sure that you serve it up with a little more than a duck egg. (For the record, the other dishes we ordered were CRAP as well, drinks fared no better.) I hate walking out of a restaurant feeling as though I were ripped off, but what's worse is that i smelled of "aggressive american" (ha! that term means NOTHING!!!) fried food for days.
PS those meatballs look gross.
Check out the video review on The Doctor's Channel.
Your hateful demeanor and lack of self-control has lost you a lot of business. Everyone has the right to their own opinion and the right to share it. You most definitely have the right to yours but by being spiteful and mean you've shown your true colours and driven people away from your restaurant.
Marc was honest in his review as well as his responses to your grammatically incorrect rantings. Do yourself a favour, if you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen!
dadadadadadadadadadadada....stooooooop you people giving me a headache, its all your fault. Joe.
Marc, wow what a storm! Such a storm it's made it to Australia!!!
Chef Joe, you really need to relax a little. If you dig a little bit about most food critics you'll find that most of them have no "formal" food related qualifications. It's all a matter of taste. From what I can read, all the blog reviews have been quite gentle in their reviews. Your defensiveness and arrogance mark you as an insecure and under threat restaurateur who is about to be hit hard.
I'm sorry, but food is about love and graciousness...of which you appear to have none.
I appreciate the reviewer's not responding to the chef with a "nyah, nyah, you can't spell!" as so many others have done.
Dear Chef Joe, If I'm in your area I think I'd have to visit your restaurant to try the food. Your menu sounds interesting and decor looks cosy. Some very funny comments happening in this post :-)
It's a excellent blog.
I like this type of blog.
Thanks.
What a waste of time......
what a loser-
As a person who has known Joe in the past, I am not entirely shocked by his rants. He carries the same arrogance out of the kitchen. That being said, I would have thought he would open his eyes a bit. He chose to make the kitchen his life. He should use his Ivy League education to ensure that his business turns into a success. Perhaps he will make a change to his menu and his attitude to please the people who will essentially make him or break him.
Let's hope that the next time he puts tongue on the menu it will be named "Bite my tongue" and will reflect a better taste and better attitude!!
I almost went to JoeDoe's today based on the episode of "Chopped" in which he appeared (and won..kind of sort of won). Thankfully, I read of his disdain for bald men. Glad to know he doesn't like us. Perhaps Joe can create a bald man's special as retribution..."40 acres and a mule" sort of thing. And to think I almost sat at the counter.
I've eated at Joe Doe's several times. Joe is a very talented chef and all great chefs are somewhat on the abrasive side. That being said Jill is always very nice and I enjoy my experience each time I go.
I dont often take bloggers or restaurant reviewers opinions to heart. If say a blogger speaks about cockroaches or health code violations I perk up but, opinions are opinions.. My only opinion about Joe Doe is that Joe is a pompous ass and I mean person at that.
Spelling Games for Kids